what is the word

I nearly didn't make it in to work this morning. Put on my clothes perfunctorily, burned the toast I made for breakfast, packed it in my bag anyway, tried to get the Internet, couldn't log on, considered calling in sick about a million times, decided it wasn't worth it. Saving sick days for the beach in summer, spontaneous trips to Fire Island & a lengthy visit to Chicago at some point. & I still can't stop thinking about Rome. Rome!
Last nite was drinks at Diner with Sara. I vetoed expensive wine in favor of beer because I'm broke this month, thru no one's fault but my own. We sat outside where it was jammed with tables & the air was a little chilly. We looked out at the Gretsch Building, proud & sparkling & new. Sara & I used to live together on the second floor of the G.B. but they kicked everyone out of the building at the end of 2001 to turn it into luxury condos. The web site says that even the hallways are "designed to reflect an attitude of privacy, pride and privilege." When we lived there the hallway was cluttered with woodpiles & a brokendown old baby carriage that gave me nitemares. It looked just exactly like this one. My boyfriend at the time used to scare me by saying the dead baby was somewhere in our apartment. Sometimes when we were lying in bed in the dark he would suddenly pretend he was the baby. In this very high quavery whisper he'd say: "I'm in the wall..."
Then I'd scream & he'd crack up.
Anyway. Those days are over. I can't afford to live in the Gretsch Building anymore & that guy was pretty much an asshole except for when he'd scare me at nite, which I secretly loved. So Sara & I got drunk at Diner & lamented this & that. I told her a story about a transgender person I know but the story was difficult to tell because this person's preferred pronoun happens to be the person's own name & while I was trying to respect this person's gender identity I was a wee bit drunk & the story was sort of a rambling mess. Then Sara told me a story about the bitchy manager at Union Pool who gave her the wrong wine, then made Sara pay $1 for the mistake, then told her they don't accept change when Sara gave her 4 quarters. I encourage everyone to bring their spare coins to Union Pool & test out this unbelievably insane & arbitrary "rule."
Later we gathered up our things to sit inside where the bartender poured us free drinks & we decided the nite had reached a point where we must end it or go with it. Needless to say, we went with it. My head hurts.