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what is the word

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Thursday, January 13, 2005

The internet has been fucked up & weird lately. My gmail's been slow, my yahoo's been slow, emails from a hotmail-using friend have been arriving almost a day late. Sitemeter isn't loading right now. At home I borrow wi-fi from my neighbors & sometimes it works like gangbusters (which I can't believe I just said) & sometimes it doesn't work at all. Today I suddenly felt, as I read some anonymous boy blogging about his online troubles somewhere, this weird new fear strike my heart. What if the internet just stopped? What if it went away? The new season of 24 has been hinting at an internet-related terrorist attack (or I think it's been hinting -- I've been way stoned this season), which at first I thought sounded retarded & not scary at all but now actually sounds like the end of the world.

I mean if it wasn't for the internet I couldn't get the words to the Who's the Boss theme song nor loads of pictures of Carlos Bernard (yum!) whenever I goddamn pleased -- not to mention the many, many hilarious Sweet Valley High reviews I treasure so -- so let's not even think about it for another second.

Let's think about something pleasant instead, like break-ups. Just kidding. Break-ups are a terrible thing. But today I was thinking about them as I walked fifteen blocks away to get my lunch at a particular halal cart, because it was 50 degrees outside & when you are wearing a trench coat & a light scarf, 50 degrees feels exactly like room temp. I was remembering the last time I got dumped. Not counting once this summer when I dumped someone, had sex with him the same nite, then got dumped by him a week later. No, the time I was thinking about was last year, on my birthday. I blogged about it, in what I think is probably my saddest post next to this one. The worst part about it wasn't that it was my birthday, or that I was drunk & crying, or that it happened right outside the fucking Abbey of all places. (I once told someone he ruined my life right outside the Abbey, which I admit was melodramatic.) It wasn't even cos he was dumping me for a person he'd met after, not before, me -- & that fucking stung. I guess it was cos I liked him. He designed the interiors of luxury aeroplanes. Oh yeah, & he was British. He knew how to drink tea properly. He cared for me when I was ill. (He called it "ill," not "sick.") He was sarcastic as hell. When we bumped into some friends of mine on the street he said hello & then tried to get rid of them. I don't know why, but I liked that. He made fun of people better than I did. Scarily better. He was smart. & he had no furniture but his computer ruled. He knew how to cook salmon, sort of. & then in front of the Abbey it all went away.

I don't know what my point is here. I suppose there isn't one. Just that I'm so happy to be on my own right now, I guess. Things hurt & then they don't. & then, sometimes, they still do. I think either way it's all ok.

& I will conclude with just one Sweet Valley review:

Sweet Valley is not the same: everybody are shocked. Young, beautiful Elizabeth Wakefield is in coma. Why? Because Elizabeth and her boyfriend Todd Wilkins fell of the motorcycle. Although Elizabeth's parents said to Elizabeth, "You are not going to ride a motorcycle, not even with Todd" Elizabeth wanted to try. Elizabeth thought, "What in the world can happen if I'm going to ride a motorcycle? Nothing, of course. I trust in Todd... and myself." But she was wrong... and now she is fighting of life and death. When Elizabeth finally wakes up from the coma, she's... different. Like... like Jessica! Now Elizabeth thinks, "Todd is the past, I am a free woman. Come on boys! Come over here."

So, what's going on with Elizabeth?




Comments:
Wow. As funny as that Sweet Valley High review is -- did you read the customer reviews? Those are hysterical. Esp. when they start "The story is told from Jessica's point of view...."
 
god kat, that post just made me really sad. i hope you're relatively ok, and i promise never to buy you whiskey while disguising myself as a vietnam vet. i might still have to lean over and wink at you periodically though.
 
kat! look! this blogger puts spam titles to pictures. its kind of funny. and i know how you love spam.
http://lucysspleen.blogs.com/photos/allday_party_2004/em_either_dancing_or_triumphant_at_twist.html
 
I just wanted to say I love your blog!
 
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